Have you ever faced a situation when two men or women got in fight for a potential mate? Of course, when dealing with girlfriend/boyfriend and official relationships such as marriage, the rules are quite clear and known to everyone. However, when still being in the free and unpredictable dating world, pretty much anything can happen until the time two people really commit officially and become a couple. Even if you’re the most peaceful, honest and friendly person with a sense of justice, sometimes the context makes conflict and competition inevitable. Here’s how to go by it so everything plays in your favor and so that you will never have to be involved or worried by such fights again.

Do not fall in the approval-seeking game

Isn’t it weird that some women will fight to death over a guy that isn’t really nice or doesn’t even care, while there are dozens of quality men only in the very same venue wishing to be with them and that are capable of fulfilling their desires? Basically, the ideal ingredients for such a fight would be a guy kissing two girls and both of them being approval seekers. They will want to win the guy over just because they will be ashamed if the other female, that could even be her friend, wins the guy over her in front of everybody. That would result in one of the girls losing approval, which can’t be handled by her if she has poor self-esteem and constantly needs a boost from others. A lot of the times that has happened, the girl that “won”, or rather the girl that didn’t abandon the stupid approval-seeking battle, would get tired and detach from the targeted man in no time. It is perfectly explainable: the girl would not be able to appreciate the man’s qualities because what she really was after was the approval from the world surrounding her. She needed proof that she was more beautiful than X to sleep well at night. Don’t fall in that category please. Same goes for men. Don’t expect much to go in your favor relationship-wise if all you wish for is to brag about your dating achievements to the boys in the dressing room.

Do not get attached to a specific outcome or a specific person

The best way to win the competition, is to actually be totally over it. Meaning, you will need to keep in mind at all times that quality men and women are everywhere, and that you have what it takes to have one of them in your life. If you’re interested in someone, just do your own thing, at your own pace. You shouldn’t feel the need to go for the steal in a bar or club simply because your targeted man or woman is getting flirted around all night. If you are really sincere and speak out your interest in getting yourself to know him or her the next day when he/she’s less “occupied”, he or she will be very grateful and you will stand out from the pack. Don’t push your fellow girls and boys around to get to the target, just wait for your time and get a real meeting with your crush during the day for example. Your inner “beast” might want to immediately go for it and eat all other candidates alive, but be patient. Remember that in the case that your crush falls for one of his/her groupies at the bar, it means he or she probably isn’t really worth it anyway. Always be willing to move on and get the person you really deserve by your side.

Focus on the real reasons and motivations for meeting someone instead of competing.